Saturday, July 21, 2012

Memphis Chronicles: The Switch

One thing I have been forced to learn this summer is how to adapt into various cultures on a daily basis. As some of you may know, I enjoy routine and I like consistency in my life. To say the Lord has taught me much about letting go of that control would be an understatement! Depending on the day, I find myself one minute sitting with a lively Vietnamese couple eating eggrolls, then sitting drinking chai with a Somalian family, then returning home to my house in the inner city while being bombarded with questions from the neighborhood kids about what my life is all about. Then there are days when I eat meals or spend time with friends in east Memphis in mansions bigger than I have ever walked into before. (The "sweet" southern life is fantastic) In the midst of all this transition, I know this is not real life for me at all. This is not normal, and I will once again switch back life at school (for one more year).

I struggle with transition, and I struggle with change. I want badly to deepen my roots and build relationships that do not end after a short season. Change makes me want to keep my distance and look ahead for what is next, rather than be wholly where I am at. I look at the life of Jesus and know he never had a permanent home, and that he loved people so deeply that his entire life was testimony of the father's love. 

I want to love without hesitation, to serve without reservation. What do I take from here? How do I transition here from my last week of my internship into my last year at JBU?

One thing is sure. I worship a God that is unchanging, my rock which I will lay my foundation. Whatever changes or transitions lie ahead, I will not be shaken-for my God is one that has been faithful to me every step the way. I will take each day with great expectation that the Holy Spirit will show up and give life to the lifeless, food to the hungry, and hope for the hopeless. I know this to be true because I myself am often lifeless, hungry, and in great need of hope. I will continually secure my deepest satisfaction in him, because I have chased the cheap and been left wanting.

Here's to tomorrow, whatever it may bring...

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Memphis Chronicles:To Fly

Run, John, run, the law commands
But gives us neither feet nor hands,
Far better news the gospel brings:
It bids us fly and gives us wings.
-John Bunyan

A friend shared this poem as he spoke truth into my burdened heart.You see, I am guilty of carrying the weight of what I am learning this summer. I now feel somewhat responsible for the brokenness and need within this city because I am no longer naive. As I wrestle with big questions, I think, "Lord, what will you have me do after I graduate? What am I supposed to do with all these wonderful and powerful experiences after I leave here? What is my purpose in all of this?"

The truth is that the law commands me to do exactly what I am unable to do. The law binds me to move in a manner in which I save, I change, and I transform the brokenness in this place out of a responsibility to what I have experienced. I am being moved to act and challenged to see God's work accomplished, but it is rising from within my own self. The beauty of the gospel is that it is the Holy Spirit that is the catalyst for change. It is the Holy Spirit that saves, changes, transforms and moves. His work will continue to be accomplished after I leave here, he doesn't need me in the slightest.

But I'm begging for wings, for I long to be apart of what the Holy Spirit is doing here. I'm praying big, for radical change beyond what my imagination can fathom. I'm asking for comforts and false senses of security to be gone that Christ my be glorified through me.

Freedom of Grace, give me wings so that I may fly.

Sunday, June 17, 2012

The Memphis Chronicles: The Scope of the Gospel

Colossians 3:11 says, "Here there is no Gentile or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all."

I have a confession. Here, in my experience with working with many people from many different backgrounds, my sin keeps getting in the way. My sin is gross, and I am realizing more and more just how much I need a savior. When Jesus walked into a room, he viewed every single person as his child, with deep love and compassion. I am struggling to love like he loved. I want so badly have eyes that see others with the transformative power of the gospel. 

I often catch myself wanting to "americanize" people, or try to stuff them into my worldview. White, American, middle class, college degree (almost), female, well churched, solid childhood-this is who I am. I often expect others to pursue the same goals I have, and be transformed more into my lifestyle to find Christ. But Jesus tore down those very barriers with the cross. The call to His kingdom does not care about any of those things I just listed about myself. His kingdom extends deep into the darkest places, and cares not about the degrees you have or the color of your skin. The Lord looks at the heart. I have no power to save myself, and there is absolutely nothing I have to offer. To be embraced into his Kingdom, I must simply accept his free gift of salvation with the obedience of my whole life.

Friends, we are all in desperate need for the gospel to be carried out in our lives. That means every race, every culture, every nation, every socioeconomic status, and every religion desperately needs him. This concept is so elementary, but do I believe this at the core of who I am? Do I see myself as more deserving of His grace because of where I have come from? Now that these issues are daily in front of my face, so are the pitfalls of my sin.


Praying for a changed heart, and changed vision. 


The scope of the gospel knows no bounds. Praise Him for stooping low to raise my own soul from the pit and grunge of sin.

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Memphis Chronicles: Refugees

Before arriving here, I wasn't aware of what a refugee really was, or how refugees ended up in Memphis in the first place. But as I hear more stories and learn more about the system, I have found out a bit more about refugees and the incredible families that have found themselves in the middle of Memphis, Tennessee. Here is the basic process, to my understanding (so I will most likely get some things wrong!).

Most refugees have fled their home countries because of war, famine, poverty, or oppression. This is not by choice, but rather a matter of survival. They will typically flee to a refugee camp where they live in the camp for 5-20 years, and have anywhere from 50-100,000 people living in them. Conditions within the camp are usually lacking a government authority, so violence and assault are common occurrences. Food is brought in and rationed out among the people. Then, Catholic Charities, a resettlement agency, brings about 3% of the refugees into various cities in the U.S and neighboring European countries. Upon coming here, they are placed within apartments and helped to adjust to the culture, and given funds for the first three months of living. They are in debt when they arrive because the money for the flight over is on loan. Families are sometimes split upon coming over, but I believe the goal is to bring them over at once.

The obstacles they face, and the obstacles we are trying to help them with is loss of friends and family, loss of roots to cultural traditions and language, and lack of education. Their greatest need upon arrival is jobs, but also language, transportation and health care. After one year in the states, they can apply for a green cards. Then after five years, they can apply for citizenship. Usually after they have come to the states, they will never return to their homeland.

These beautiful people have taught me so much about God's provision. Their stories are often full of hardships and obstacles that I never could imagine going through. The strength of these people is constantly amazing me, and I catch myself complaining about being hot, or not having what I want to eat when I want to eat it? Most of the women I work with are single moms with 2-10 kids, and I am astounded by their ability to overcome hardship. 

I want to raise awareness that God's people from all the nations are right here in our cities! When I think about it, when I die and go to heaven, I will be the minority as a white American...which is so cool and crazy to think about! My prayer this summer is that God will challenge my heart to be more like His, and that I will love His people from all over the world like He loves them.

Sunday, June 3, 2012

Memphis Chronicles:Two Week Mark

After two weeks here, I am really unsure about what has happened thus far. It has been a blur, and feels like I have been here for two months. Everyday I feel like I am in a different country, and not just one country, but multiple countries at once. I am learning so much about various cultures, religions and languages. My heart has been heavy to understand what my role is within all of this.                             

One major theme the Lord keeps throwing at me is the discipline of prayer. Do I pray with expectancy that the Lord is going to work in the hearts of my new Muslim friends? Do I pray with fervor for the gospel to be made known in the darkest places of the world? Do I trust John 14:13 that says, "Whatever you ask in my name, that will I do, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask Me anything in my name, I will do it." Do I pray for that "anything"? Do I trust him?

"How would our world change if all our prayers were answered?"-anonymous

Friday, June 1, 2012

Memphis Chronicles: A video



History and purpose behind Ekata Designs!

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Memphis Chronicles:The Clinics

Every morning this week we have divided into two groups to share the gospel with patients in the medical clinics. How it works is that after the patients are brought into the room and are waiting for the doctor to arrive, we enter the room as Spiritual Health Advisors because "here at Christ Community we care about your spiritual and emotional health as well as your physical". We ask them to rate their spiritual health as a transition into how they view God, and then hopefully a door to share Christ will present itself. It has been amazing to walk into the rooms and watch people open up and share about their lives, as well as an incredible experience to share truth of the bible with people. Plus I have sort of been forced into gaining confidence in evangelism with complete strangers, something I have not well practiced in at all.

Just a few thoughts of what I have taken away from these crazy, packed experiences...

-Everyone has a story to tell, and so many people are hungry for someone to sit and listen to their hurt and pain. We are all human, we are all broken, and pain is pain no matter what color you are, where you grew up, or what you believe. I am learning compassion.

-Allowing the Holy Spirit to lead your speech in sharing the gospel with people is essential. I really have no idea what that means in practice, but I have watched others who have shared with 100's of patients and I can see the compassion in their eyes and the truth spoken as the Holy Spirit leads them. There is something special about the way they interact with people that I have never seen before. Bathe it all in prayer.

-There is such a great need for the gospel to be spread in the city of Memphis. I see trends of people saying spirituality is going church and doing good things. Works based salvation is very common theme to see with the patients.Then again, I degrade the cross to what I do and do not do far too often myself.

-And finally?  I can't. I can't say the right things, I can't be compassionate enough, I can't share the gospel clear enough, and I can't relate to people's stories well enough. I can't.

God is so good, and I am so thankful for the chance to be here.

Monday, May 21, 2012

Memphis Chronicles: The Orientation

        After months without a blog post, I decided to pick it back up again to update my supporters and share about what the Lord is teaching me and how he is working here in the city of Memphis. Also, writing really helps me process, so this is a great way to sort out all I am learning, even if no one actually reads this.                                                                                                                                                             As some of you know, I am interning for Christ Community Ministries this summer which is primarily a refugee ministry in Memphis, Tennessee. I am also living with a family that lives in the inner city neighborhood of Binghampton as “intentional neighbors” in order to share the love of Christ to those that live around them.                                                                     
       After only being here a few days, the Lord has already shaken and convicted my heart. I find myself asking big questions, setting many goals, and learning things I never imagined I would learn.                
       The family that I am living with is wonderful. They have welcomed me into their home and chosen to continue life as usual while they raise their two kids and live in a broken neighborhood that is so different from where they have come from. I have already wondered how they do it. Their home is incredibly disciplined yet grace driven, and scriptural truth is taught and demonstrated everyday as they interact with one another. But when I walk out the door? I see poverty, domestic violence, addiction, brokenness, and sin. How do you raise kids here? How do they strategically love your family and your neighbors at the same time? They do it because they have been called to live here with great purpose and intentionality by loving people where the most need is. There is an incredible need for the love of Christ to be made known here. They have taken seriously the command to “love your neighbor”. How can I as well build relationships and engage in the neighborhood here this summer?                                                            
       Today I went to the clinic on day two of my internship with the new medical resident students. We were trained on the work of Christ Community, taught the model of discipleship found in Luke 10, and shown the ultimate goal of the Church found in the New Testament (crazy good!). After that, we were trained on how to “story” the gospel for oral based people groups, and communicate the whole gospel clearly. Tomorrow? We are going into the clinics for what they call “spiritual healthy advising”. We will enter into waiting rooms with a single patient and ask a few questions about their spiritual health as a door to share the gospel with them.                        
             I could go on for pages, and I have only been here 5 days. I look forward to updating things again soon. Thank you for your prayers concerning what the Lord is doing here!

Thursday, February 2, 2012

crave.



The life lived here beats heavy, the drum rarely letting for the dancer to take a breath. Sunshine is limited, and the gaze past today is cloudy at best. My head is heavy, my eyes are rapid as I strain to lift my eyes above my shuffling feet.
I shuffle.
I trudge.
I work.
I go.
I run.
I fight.
I battle.
I try...oh how I try.

Weary, I already tire of trying. Then clarity comes, the clouds lift momentarily to see a deep purpose. My Jesus, who fought for me says, "I have already won the battle for you, my dear. I have fought, I have tried and I have won. The victory is in Me, and in Me alone. Will you find your worth wholly in me? Will you lift your eyes and see the need for My name to be spoken out loud to the hurting? Stop getting trapped in a mindless routine of effort.

I have found you.
I have found you worthy.
I have found you lovely.
I have found you whole.
I have found you, and claimed you as my own.

Father, I crave you. Father, I crave a kingdom perspective. Remind me again my worth is in you, and in nothing else. Shift my gaze higher, lift my eyes to what matters past tomorrow. When time and space are through, I'll be found in you.